Over the course of the last few years, there has been much discussion in regard to body image, in particular, weight and body size…
…And I feel that for the most part, that is a good thing. This discourse has opened the eyes of a lot of people including advertisers to some degree. Skinny is no longer the end all be all. Beautiful women come in all shapes and all sizes, and one’s self-worth is not determined by the number on the tag inside of their jeans. And that is as it always should have been.
I do so admire the women who, regardless of their size, absolutely love their own bodies. They love it, they own it, they rock it. They give not a thought (or at least very minimal thought) to any self-perceived flaws nor the faux flaws that society and the media attempt to put upon them. Alas, I am not one of those women.
Here is where the “for the most part” in my first sentence comes into play. All of this self-body love can occasionally make me feel somewhat inadequate. And I’m sure that I’m not the only one. Why would that make me feel inadequate? Shouldn’t the fact that other women are rockin’ on with their bad selves make me feel good? I mean after all, we are all in this together, and any stride forward for one is a stride forward for the sisterhood.
Here’s why…quite simply, I am not happy with my body at the moment. There. I said it out loud. No, I’m not caught up in self-loathing; I left that behind in my thirties. Nor do I berate myself in the mirror every time I catch a glimpse of myself. And no, I am absolutely not fishing for compliments. But also no, I am not digging my body in it’s current state. You see, here’s the thing; there is and has always been, a particular weight range that I am comfortable at. That range is where I feel my healthiest, look my best and feel most comfortable in my own skin. I feel like me.
What I’m not digging has very little to do with age or the aging process. Of course I’m not pumped about the wrinkles and additional cellulite. But those things are what they are. I deal with them just like everyone else. The extra weight I’m carrying around though? Plain and simple, it’s because over the course of the last year or so I have allowed things to go to shit. I cannot simply accept it as the way I am now. My eating habits are absurd and my former gym rat self has morphed into a straight up couch vegetable. The sad truth is that I know how to eat and I know how to work out. I was a bodybuilder for a good fifteen years for God’s sake, so I absolutely have the knowledge necessary to live my healthiest life. The problem has been the willpower and the desire. I have allowed some darker emotions to dictate my habits and that my friends, is no bueno.
But I digress. Does it make me any “less” because I refuse to allow my body to continue in it’s current state? Does it make me a self-flagellator? Does it mean that I don’t love myself? Of course not. But every once in awhile, when I’m inundated with “love yourself the way you are” messages I wonder. I’m not chasing after some unattainable media constructed ideal body; nor am I chasing after the body I had in my late thirties when I was still hardcore into bodybuilding. I’m simply looking to get back to where I’m comfortable in my own skin. No more, no less. It is perfectly okay to not be okay with your body. Wanting to improve and do better is okay as long as it’s for the right reasons. There’s no shame in that. And at the heart of it, isn’t that what loving one’s own body is really all about?
Last month my beautiful friend Ann from Kremb De La Kremb and I tried out our first experiment in virtual shopping together. You can read all about the process and see the piece we chose last month here. We had so much fun doing it, and I also had some reader requests, so we decided to do it again.
This go ’round we had better luck. Neither of us were particularly pleased with last months piece, I actually ended up giving it to my daughter. This time though? Oh man, I am in love with this gingham shirt that Ann found at Target. Initially I was kind of like, “Eh”. But the more I looked at it online the more I developed a bit of a crush. And when it arrived I could not have been happier! It’s a piece from Target’s Who What Wear line and it’s actually the first piece I’ve purchased from that line. If this gingham shirt is any indicator, I’ll be going back for more. The fit and quality are excellent, especially for the money.
Gingham is one of those prints that plays really well with not only solids, but pretty much any other print you would want to pair it with. I own one other gingham shirt and as you can see here, it’s beautiful paired with a floral print. I actually did that today with the floral print in my shoes. Plus, there is the additional print on the bandana. I have to say though, I wish that I had just a plain red square neck scarf. I’m thinking the bandana almost took it into farmer’s daughter territory which isn’t exactly what I was going for.
Fortunately, my favorite shredded boyfriend jeans along with the floral lace up flats, saved me from looking like I was heading to the barn to milk Bessie.
Ann kept it casual too. Keep in mind, we don’t consult each other in regard to how we’re styling the piece; that’s part of the fun! I love how vibrant her coral shorts look paired with the black and white gingham. Her super cute satin knot slides somehow keep it casual yet magically dress it up at the same time. And seriously friends…how cute is that camera bag of hers? Definitely hop over to krembdelakremb.com for all the deets on her outfit. And while you’re at, I highly recommend you give her a follow on Instagram for a constant source of cool eclectic outfit inspiration!
If you haven’t already, give gingham a whirl. It’s a fun, versatile print that is just begging to be mixed with other prints. If you’re starting to feel the gingham love like I am, here are a few super fabulous options:
THE LINK UPS
Check out the weekly link ups I participate in for even more fashion and style ideas…