Silk Skirt & Harness Boots: Love Advocate

Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look.

I’ve gone back and forth on this in my head for the last two days. I’ve debated myself; I’ve literally agonized over it. I have finally reached the conclusion that I cannot, I will not, remain silent. Yes, this is a fashion blog, but more importantly, it has grown into my space to share my thoughts, ideas and feelings. Yes, we are all well and truly politic-ed out; I am exhausted emotionally, physically and mentally, but I cannot go quietly forward and leave all of what’s inside me unsaid…

THE STORY

…If you are of the mind that this should all simply be about fashion and style then skip this portion, that’s cool with me.  If you find it offensive that I would see fit to discuss politics on a “fashion blog”, that’s okay too; you don’t have to stick around.  If you want to judge me for my personal feelings, then move the f**k on.

I know that there are good people who voted for that man. I don’t judge you. I don’t understand you, but I don’t judge you. And I expect the same courtesy from you. If you plan on leaving hateful snarky comments at the end of this post, leave NOW. I will not tolerate it, I will not allow it. Enough seeds of hatred have been sown in the last year to last a million lifetimes.

I thought about going the comic route with this post, but to be brutally honest with you, it is still far too raw for me to glean any humor from it. Yes, I found him endlessly amusing when he was merely a candidate, but now that he is the leader of the free world? Not a damn thing amusing about that. I’m not here to debate the moral character of Hillary Clinton. No, she is certainly not a pillar of virtue. This is not about party affiliation. Yes, I am a registered Democrat, but I have on a number of occasions voted Republican in the past. And I can assure you, if that man had been the Democratic candidate I would have voted straight Republican all the way. My issue is not with Republicans, not at all. My issue is with the utter lack of humanity displayed over and over again by him.

The seeds of hatred that have been sown? Those seeds that have given a voice to the dark hateful underbelly of our society did not come from her. And do not presume to tell me that they did. I am not stupid. I have paid attention. I have watched the rallies and the debates. The hateful ugly people who are part of organizations that have remained hidden on the fringes of our society were given a voice by the one voice that bullied it’s way above the others. And I don’t know about you, but it has been my experience that all of the nasty ugly posts in my Facebook feed (which btw I have tried to avoid) have come from his side of the aisle. I’m not saying there aren’t haters from the Clinton camp out there. I am saying that in my feed, in particular from members of my family, that is where the ugly continues to come from. It needs to stop.

The man who is now the leader of my country has denigrated everything that I value and hold dear to my heart. My son’s hard won rights to live his life in the same manner as your straight children are now in danger, very real danger. I cannot believe that I now live in a country where, as a mother, I have to live in constant fear for my child’s safety because it is now okay to be public about your hatred of those different from yourself. The children to whom I have dedicated my heart, my soul and my life to teaching and protecting have been openly mocked by the man who will reside in the White House. That being a fact, why should anyone else with ugliness in their heart feel any need to hold back. Hey, if it’s okay for the president to do it, it’s okay for me. And I’ve told you before that my kids are well aware of his behavior and were hurt by it, so how do you think their little hearts felt the morning after the election?

Do you know what we have been doing in citizenship class the last two days? Watching funny puppy videos. Hearing their laughter and watching the joy on their faces took away a little bit of the pain. It is now my mission, more then ever,  to insure that there is happiness in their hearts and love surrounding them every single moment they are with me.

And the world I prefer to live in is not about building walls; it’s not about singling people out because of their religious beliefs or the color of their skin. No, I’m not some freakin’ Pollyanna who thinks everyone is good. Far, far from it. Yes, we need to look more carefully at who we let into our country; the way the world is today we would be foolish not to. But to wall off an entire country? To ban every single member of a particular religious affiliation? How is that even a little bit okay? It’s not.

Have I touched on any of the real political issues; the economy, taxes, trade? No. Why? In a normal election, those things would have certainly played into how I cast my ballot. This was not a normal election. Not by a long shot. For me, this election was about being a decent human being. It was about not allowing the spread of a hateful cruel rhetoric that has the potential to grow into a cancer eating away at the soul of our nation. Am I saying that if you cast your vote for him you aren’t a decent human being? No. I realize that people were looking for change, for something different to shake up the political system. But for me, the vileness that spewed from his mouth on the daily was not the change that was needed. This is not some damn reality show, this is our lives; my life, my childrens’ lives, the lives of my students, the lives of the entire world.

If anything good can come from this mess, I hope that it is this; it will perhaps motivate those of us who have been complacent to become advocates. Advocates for those who are in the minority, regardless of what that minority is; advocates for what it means to be a kind, decent human being; advocates for compassion, understanding and love. I can tell you with absolute certainty that I will spend the next four years doing my part to fight back the ugliness and bury it back under the rock from which it crawled.

In closing, again, do not presume to tell me that I am wrong or that I am overreacting. I am not. This is how I feel, this is what I believe, so for me it is right. If you would like to comment, to begin a dialogue, that is fine. But as I said, ugliness and hatred will not be permitted. Not on my blog, not in my life, not in my world.

THE OUTFIT

Yaaa…it feels a tad trite after all of that to talk clothes. But ya know what, the world continues to spin and I still have to get dressed in the morning. This poor silk skirt has resided in my attic for close to ten years now. Every single time I thinned the herd, I kept it. Now I’m glad that I did because I’m loving it all over again. And after ten years it’s like having something brand new.

I’m looking forward to pairing it with a much chunkier sweater because that will be a pretty cool juxtaposition, but it’s still a bit too warm for chunky knits. In lieu of that, I found my juxtaposition via the leather harness boots. Total opposition, totally fabulous in my book.

And how about we take a minute to appreciate the delicate awesomeness that are these earrings shall we? They are not only beautiful, but truly so lightweight you can’t even tell that you’re wearing them. They were a gift to me from the lovely Raine of Essentially Raine Boutique on Instagram. I know many of you are already followers, but if you’re not, what are you waiting for?!

THE TIP

Whenever possible I always go for pieces that are complete and utter opposites of one another. It’s just way more fun that way. And hey, be a love advocate; share it, spread it, live it. #loveadvocate

THE LINK UPS

Check out the weekly link ups I participate in for even more fashion and style ideas…

Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look.Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look. Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look. Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look.Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look. Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look. Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look. Silk skirt, leather harness boots and sweater. How to add edge to a feminine look.

Skirt: Similar;  Sweater: Walmart (Similar);  Boots: Target (Similar)

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26 Comments

  1. Marsha
    11.10.2016 / 10:21 pm

    You’ve said what I’ve felt since early Wednesday morning when I awoke to discover the results. My granddaughter’s godfathers are married…for now. One of the loveliest people I know has finally found happiness with her girlfriend…I anxiously await a wedding invite. I am hoping, as one friend has suggested, that he reverts to his more liberal views instead of following Marketing 101 and giving the public what they want to hear. The one thing that came from this was hearing from my son how much he appreciated the way I raised him…to accept everyone no matter what. I absolutely refuse to give in to despondency because I do believe people are inherently good. I’m going to hold on to that thought and keep advocating for those who can’t necessarily do it. You keep doing what you’re doing…it doesn’t go unnoticed.

    • debbies
      11.12.2016 / 10:05 am

      Thank you so very much for your kind words Marsha; it truly means so much. And yes, more than ever before, it is up to us…all of us…to advocate for not only those of in the minorities, but for each other. I really feel that if we can as a people, maintain this momentum that has been spurred by all of this ugliness and work together and fight and change it into something good then in the end we will prevail. What is right will prevail. What is good will prevail. Hopefully one day, the dark era we are now entering will go down in the history books as the period of time that the people of the United States shined the brightest and the hope that our nation was once known for will be proven to be alive and well.

  2. 11.10.2016 / 10:32 pm

    Standing O, my dear. Standing O.

    Peace,
    bettye

    • debbies
      11.12.2016 / 10:08 am

      Thank you my beautiful friend. It had to be said, I could not not say it. And I will continue to say it…over and over again. I have never been one for political activism; not that I was against it, I just never had a reason. Now I do. I will write letters. I will donate money to groups that are worthy. I will protest and march when the opportunity presents itself. I will be a voice and I will be heard. xo

  3. 11.11.2016 / 2:29 am

    Shouting out Yesssssssss Yes and Yes to every sentence of this post!! I’m also feeling it over here too, and by the way you look Fabulous and that skirt is TDF.
    Neti recently posted…TomorrowMy Profile

    • debbies
      11.12.2016 / 10:12 am

      Thank you Neti…I am so glad I kept the skirt because it is a beauty for sure! I think we are all feeling it, no matter where it is in the world we call home. That man has the potential to wreak havoc across the globe. And to the individuals who say, “He’s one man, he doesn’t have THAT much power,” for God’s sake…wake up! He is the leader of the United States of America; he does have that power and he has the backing of a Republican Congress to do it.

  4. Kris
    11.11.2016 / 10:48 am

    You are amazing my friend! Mother to Mother we will fight for what’s right for our children, other people’s children and the children yet to come. I will always fight to see that every person has the same human rights as another. It’s what love is all about! ❤️

    • debbies
      11.12.2016 / 10:50 am

      No more so than you are my beautiful best friend. You said once something along the lines of God had blessed us with our sons because he knew that we would love them unconditionally. That is 100% true and that will never ever change. I will fight for them as well everyone else who is being denied their human rights regardless of the reason. We must all feel safe, welcome, and wanted otherwise it is not the country we say it is.

  5. 11.11.2016 / 1:23 pm

    This was NEVER about Hillary, or feminism for me. Basic human rights are at stake, and the backlash has already begun, with ‘pussy grabbing’, calling people of color derogatory names, bashing and tormenting LGBT by the underbelly of our nation. Perhaps the negative activities are being hyped online, but if a single soul is disturbed because that man is taking office, we are set back.
    Do I expect that my granddaughters will be afforded the same opportunities as my grandsons? Hell yes. I also expect freedom of religion, freedom to marry and every other gain we have made under the Obama administration.
    I agree with you, as I almost always do, whether it’s fashion, or life in America, that we MUST not back down in our collective thoughts on these subjects. Our elected officials need to listen, and understand that they are in office at our behest, not because they are special, but because we elected them. They can be un-elected just as easily, from the house in 2 years time, and the senate in 4-6.
    As a woman, I have struggled for 45 years to attain equity with my male peers on the job. I am closer than many, as I have specialized technology skills. I was honestly hopeful that Hillary would get more than a concussion against that glass ceiling this time. I would have been incredibly grateful for 4 more years of the same, as we made great strides socially, over the past 8 years, My blue collar husband expressed the same thoughts at the beginning of the election cycle, ‘ Can’t he just stay 4 more years?’
    I am determined to support politicians and organizations that work towards the retention of human rights, the preservation of our planet, and the ideal of equity for all genders.
    Even if it is from an internment camp.

  6. 11.11.2016 / 3:54 pm

    We have been watching the news here in the UK all week Debbie, first thing I did was look on Twitter to see who had won. I’m sure Hillary was in front when we went to bed the night before too. My facebook timeline has been jam pack full of upset friends from the UK and America 🙁

    Love your boots Debbie, great style. I love wearing boots with dresses and skirts.

    Thanks for sharing at the weekend blog hop
    clairejustine recently posted…My Winter Travel Bucket List..My Profile

  7. 11.11.2016 / 7:37 pm

    I agree. Completely. And I support your voice. It’s therapeutic for us to say what we believe on important subjects.
    Shybiker recently posted…My Essay Is Online!My Profile

    • debbies
      11.12.2016 / 10:50 pm

      Thank you my friend and I so appreciate your support. It is therapeutic to share sometimes and I knew there was just no way that I could let it all go unsaid…

  8. 11.12.2016 / 10:21 pm

    I hope I do not sound to trite if I say words well said and a skirt well saved. I think we are all a little scared of what it all means.

    • debbies
      11.12.2016 / 10:48 pm

      Not trite at all Linda, thank you. And I hope I don’t sound ridiculous when I say that I feel as if we owe your country as well as the rest of the world a huge apology…

  9. 11.13.2016 / 1:04 am

    I’ve been sad and in disbelief since Tuesday night. I think the hatred that has been spread has already done so much damage and will continue to do so for a long time. I’ve been thinking of what I can do to make a difference. Almost all the political posts I read on Facebook don’t contribute to a real dialogue. How do you start a real dialogue? People seem to only truly read what they already believe and quickly and superficially dismiss everything else… It’s so easy to put the “other side” in a box and give it certain labels…

    Sometimes I feel like I live in a “coastal bubble” here in California. We watched the election results at some friends’ house with a bunch of other people and no one there claimed to know anyone who voted for Trump (which I’m sure isn’t true; but I realize that people don’t exactly openly admit to it around here). I actually know a lot of people who voted for him, mainly on Facebook (but also extended family). I was quite surprised by quite a few of them as I know them to be kind, caring people (I know that people voted for him for a variety of reasons, but it’s hard for me to understand how one can overlook the extreme negativity he spreads and how that will affect the lives of millions of people…).

    For now, I have decided to keep my blog politics free as it has been my “happy place” since I started blogging almost eight years ago, and with so much heaviness everywhere, I need a light and bright space in my life… But I also know I have to and will get more involved. I started wearing a safety pin today and will do so very day. I know it’s just a small symbol, but it’s a small start…
    Andrea@WellnessNotes recently posted…Long CardigansMy Profile

  10. 11.13.2016 / 5:54 pm

    Very well said lady!

    This has been such a huge shock to everyone worldwide.

    I’m keeping my fingers crossed he won’t be as bad as we all imagine.

    bisous
    Suzanne
    Suzanne recently posted…6 Serious Thrift Shopper Fighting TechniquesMy Profile

  11. 11.13.2016 / 9:23 pm

    Suzanne Carillo pointed me in your direction and I’m so glad she did. Thank you for this post, for these words, that are truly borne out of love. I was thinking today how my heartbreak has to do with the fact that the country I love–and I’ve only recently realized how much I love it–has been taken over by something I would never have imagined. It literally feels like we have been invaded by hate. I keep wondering to myself if I am being a spoiled sport, a sore loser, but the very next thought after that is that this isn’t a game. This is real life. People’s lives–my life, my loved one’s lives–are impacted by what has just happened. So my heart has plummeted in sadness, brokenness, and I am sick with the idea that this man will be leading our country for the next 4 years.

    Anyway…thank you for saying what my heart was feeling and for allowing me a moment to speak from my broken heart. I’m with you in your mission to build and spread love over hate.

    Blessings and gratitude,
    Sherry
    http://www.petiteover40.com

  12. 11.14.2016 / 6:19 am

    Hi Debbie – greetings from London. You have my sympathy – this will be a very painful experience for the USA. We had the “Brexit” vote this year and it has torn the UK apart. Now that the dust is settling here, we are starting to look at the underlying reasons for why people voted “leave” and it’s clear that people felt ignored by the elite. This seems to be what drove the Trump success too. If we can go back to more honest dialogue without “the elite” politicians ignoring the views of ordinary people, then we will at least have made some progress despite the pain.

    The silk skirt is gorgeous and looks great with those boots. I found some new life for two old coats if you want to shimmy over to my site.
    Gail recently posted…A tale of two coatsMy Profile

  13. 11.14.2016 / 8:10 am

    Well said and I completely agree . We need to be on a mission to spread more love and less hate!

    This neutral look is so pretty! Love your skirt!

    Jill
    Doused In Pink
    Jill recently posted…Classic Style & TFF LinkupMy Profile

  14. 11.14.2016 / 8:40 am

    Beautifully and powerfully written. So much hate (and yes I had to delete my own family’s emails many times). Let’s work for healing, love conquers hate, and let’s also work for the good causes that may get trampled. Thanks for sharing, xox
    Patti recently posted…How To Add Bright Color: Visible MondayMy Profile

  15. 11.14.2016 / 3:58 pm

    It had to be said, Debbie, and I am glad you were the one to utter the words, “This is not a reality show.” How is this new world we are forced to live in be, with a leader who (apparently) has no concept of words bearing consequences? I see the incident in Michigan with the middle school kids. I read about Muslims being beat up without provocation. I see in the news how members of the LGBTQ are walking about in fear. HOW IS IT POSSIBLE IN THIS DAY AND AGE?? I am so sad and shocked and scared and fearful, for myself, for Eve, for my family. Collectively, all of us are immigrants. Individually, Eve and I are female immigrants. If we are to understand our new president correctly, we are no longer welcomed in this country. Neither are children with special needs. Or anyone else whose skin is of a different colour, who calls God by a different name. It worries me to death, the legacy we are shaping. I look around and wonder who else thinks like Trump? Who else thinks we ought to be deported, or arrested, or beaten up. It is no way to live, living in fear. And Eve has been immensely vocal about the entire election, and the results thereof, sharing her thoughts on her own blog. I am proud and, at the same time, fearful for her.

    It seems as though every other sentence I’ve written in response to your post, Debbie, is punctuated with the word “fear” or its synonym, doesn’t it? Is this what we have come to? Living in fear? I have no answers, I doubt anyone has. I am only praying that everyone proceeds with immense caution and care, measuring each word thrice, until such a time that emotions no longer run as raw, and we may perhaps be able to come out of this, with as little scarring as possible. I know, it sounds naive, but I am praying xoxo

  16. 11.14.2016 / 4:58 pm

    It’s so important to be honest and true to yourself. Good for you for saying your piece Debbie. I think the whole world is still reeling with shock at this result. It’s a worry to think of the damage and backward steps that can be taken in the course of 4 long years of his rule.
    BTW love this ruffle skirt – it looks fab with those boots x
    Anna
    http://www.annasislandstyle.com
    Anna Parkes recently posted…As suggested by…JudyMy Profile

  17. Vivian
    11.14.2016 / 6:36 pm

    Thank you for putting into words what I couldn’t. It’s been so hard to describe the sadness that I’ve felt since last Tuesday…it feels SO personal. I’m praying that as a nation, we are able to come together and not let hate, prejudice, fear and racism steal what WE know in our hearts to be the truth.

  18. 11.15.2016 / 6:55 am

    Thank you for this post. I wish more bloggers did that, talked about what’s going on. There’s no reason to keep politics out of your blog: it’s part of life, and your views are part of who you are. In times like these people need to take a stand against hate, and people need to see that there are others who feel the same fear. How else can people start building bridges, finding others to fight for the good?
    Tiina L recently posted…Winter Came EarlyMy Profile

  19. 11.17.2016 / 4:56 pm

    Debbie, I applaud you for voicing your feelings, opinions, passions, and thoughts in your space. It seems recently no one’s feelings, opinions, passions, and thoughts are safe from ridicule no matter what side you fall on. But, like you said, this is your space. I have tried to remain neutral in this debacle of an election, and yet I was still harshly and cruelly attacked for voicing my thoughts and opinions and passions in my space. (This is no way a critique of anything, but the people who attacked me with cruel and childish name-calling made it clear that they were not on the Trump-side of things.) I don’t like the man either and can totally understand why you despise him. And I support you entirely. But more importantly, I respect you. I respect your feelings, your thoughts, your opinions. I respect your freedom to speak out about the things that you are passionate about. But now I am on a mission to respond to all of the hatred with kindness and love. #SpreadTheKindness #teamshelbee #agirlonamission

    And you are right, this is no longer about the pretty clothes (but you do look fabulous, as usual), it is about getting everyone to a place of kindness and love.

    Thanks so much for bravely voicing your passions and for linking up with me On the Edge.

    Shelbee
    http://www.shelbeeontheedge.com

  20. 11.19.2016 / 11:27 am

    Hi Deb. I support what you wrote . I told my hubby that our society seems so fixated on “celebrity’ that I wonder if they voted for the Apprentice. I too, hope for a positive outcome, as I was truly surprised when I found out the results Tues evening. On to your outfit, I had a smiliar skirt in pale pink silk I no longer have, I am now careful what I give away! I love this beautiful ruffled hem and those rugged booties.. so fun and pretty! They look like Fryes, are they? Pretty detail with you choker and necklace.
    Have a great weekend
    jess xx
    http://www.elegantlydressedandstylish.com