Cargo Pants & Block Heeled Sandals: Accepting Your Inner Child

Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater.

I’ll admit it. I can sometimes be self-centered. Not as in I’m convinced of my own fabulousness. It’s more along the lines of the way a child is more concerned with their own needs than of those of the people around them…

THE STORY

…Years ago I read an excellent book about the psychological effects on a girl when she loses her mom at an early age; my own mother passed away when I was 17. One particular concept in the book really resonated with me; it said that oftentimes a girl’s emotional growth will stop or “freeze” at the age at which she lost her mother, particularly if the loss followed an extended illness which in my case it did. That explains both the yin and the yang of my personality. I can be a boatload of fun because I still occasionally act like a teenager; it isn’t always a bad thing to have your inner girl still alive and well. But I can also be a total brat.

One of the beautiful things about getting older though is self-awareness. I have learned to control both of these aspects of my personality (to a certain extent) simply because I am aware of them and aware of why they exist. Oddly enough this awareness makes me less tolerant of the behavior in others. I think because I make every effort to rein in this less than desirable aspect of my personality, I get frustrated with those who don’t. Does that make sense?

Self-improvement is a journey. Sometimes it is done with intent and other times we learn to be better through experience. We also need to learn to embrace our faults; no one is perfect and learning to accept ourselves, battle scars and all is an important step in that journey. So while I strive to make my “inner brat” a little less bratty, I also try to remember to appreciate the inner girl who makes life a little more amusing than it would otherwise be.

THE OUTFIT

This is really a pretty basic outfit; skinny cargo pants, block heeled sandals and a spring sweater. What takes it from basic is the colors and the accessories. The layered turquoise necklaces and bracelets add a pretty touch of bling while the crazy mix of colors in the marled sweater brightens things up.

What makes it special though, at least in my opinion, are the red block heeled sandals. Seriously, what is it about a red shoe, whether it be a strappy sandal or a a pair of Converse that really makes an outfit pop? In addition to this pair of sandals, I have red lace up flats, red Converse and the ever popular red ankle boots. No matter what they are paired with, a red shoe is always a winner. I do need to pick up a pair of red pumps though…

THE TIP

Red shoes. Whether they be sneakers, flats or a smokin’ hot pair of stilettos, get yourself a pair of red shoes.

THE LINK UPS

Check out the weekly link ups I participate in for even more fashion and style ideas…

Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater. Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater.Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater. Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater.Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater.Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater.Red block heeled sandals, cargo pants and sweater.

Sandals: JCPenney;  Pants: Target (Similar);  Sweater: Walmart (Similar)

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22 Comments

  1. 05.8.2017 / 9:56 am

    I think we all have an inner brat—in fact I was just arguing with mine earlier this morning!! But maybe that’s the advantage of age…hopefully we learn when to let her out and when not to! Ha ha!
    I have to tell you that your sweater reminds me of some yarn I have. I made a tank top out of it, but I don’t think I’ve ever worn it on the blog—otherwise I’d show it to you!! But it’s such a beautiful mix of colors, Debbie!!
    Jodie
    http://www.jtouchofstyle.com
    Jodie filogomo recently posted…How Your Hat Can Make a StatementMy Profile

    • debbies
      05.11.2017 / 7:32 pm

      Thanks Jodie! I really love the colors in the sweater too. For the most part, my brat is under control. Sometimes though, something will unexpectedly set me off and she is unleashed and out of my control….then I just have to let her tire herself out…lol!

  2. Elizabeth
    05.8.2017 / 11:25 am

    Now the old Elvis Costello song, “The Angels Wanna Wear My Red Shoes” is stuck in my head! Love the shoes and the great mix of colors in this outfit. As always, you bring up some intriguing ideas. I often find that the qualities I dislike in others are aspects of my own behavior that I struggle with. If someone is really bothering me, I’ve learned to analyze why I am so upset. Are they demonstrating a trait that I don’t like to admit that I share? Am I envious because they feel free to behave badly while I try to be “good”?

    • debbies
      05.11.2017 / 8:19 pm

      You are so right Elizabeth…excellent insight! The incident that inspired this post involved an adult behaving in an utterly ridiculous and juvenile mean-spirited manner. It wasn’t so much that I wanted to behave that way too, it was more “I’m a good girl and I wouldn’t act like that…so it’s not fair that you get what you want for behaving badly…”

  3. 05.8.2017 / 11:43 am

    That’s interesting, that theory that you stay at the mental age you were when your mother passed away. I was 30 and it was a sudden loss no time to prepare, and yet in many ways I’ve never felt like I’ve “grown up.” Maybe that’s part of it, never thought of that before.

    And yes red shoes are definitely a mood and ego booster. Right now I have a pair of red Converse that I always feel fun and funky in, and young, and they always get a lot of comments from people.

    Love your blending of olive tones and turquoise jewelry.

    xoxo Bettye

    • debbies
      05.11.2017 / 8:22 pm

      Isn’t the red shoe phenomenon a weird thing? Like I said, that one statement in that book (Motherless Daughters is the title if you’re interested) really hit home. It explained so much about how I felt and who I was and how I behaved. Our relationships with our parents are such complex things…

    • debbies
      05.11.2017 / 8:25 pm

      Thank you so much Darlene! 🙂

  4. 05.8.2017 / 8:01 pm

    Very nice look Debbie. If fact since I have both, cargo pants and red shoes, I might steal your look for future post. Hope you wouldn’t mind 🙂

    • debbies
      05.11.2017 / 8:26 pm

      Absolutely! Feel free to steal away! 🙂

    • debbies
      05.11.2017 / 8:28 pm

      Lol…I’ve always said it would be perfect if I could have my current wisdom in my 30 year old body…

  5. 05.9.2017 / 6:13 am

    One of my absolute favourite looks is combats with heels – ever since I saw Kylie Minogue wear hers with bright yellow heels, I’ve wanted to emulate that style! You look stunning as always.
    I lost my mother when I was 13 so I can certainly understand what you’re talking about, although she died really suddenly which was a massive shock to us all. I think in some small way I’m probably still dealing with the shock all these years later, to be honest.
    Hugs
    Suzy xxx
    http://www.suzyturner.com
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  6. 05.9.2017 / 10:58 am

    Great look, those colors really suit you. The red heels and turquoise jewelry make it special as you say.
    Gail recently posted…The Next bodycon summer dressMy Profile

  7. 05.11.2017 / 10:52 am

    Ah, that inner brat, we all have one, don’t we. But thankfully, as you’ve said, no one is perfect and thank God for that. I agree that when you suffer a profound loss at a young age – I lost my dad when I was in my 20s – there is definitely a part of you that remains frozen time. It could absolutely explain why I have never “acted my age.” “Growing up” would mean letting go of him. I guess that means I will never grow up.

    On to your look – love it all! Those red shoes are so happy and bright. I’ve really been getting into red lately and love those sandals!

    Mary
    http://marymurnane.com

  8. 05.12.2017 / 4:55 pm

    Love the colours in your top Debbie, it was made for those trousers!! They look great together 🙂 Thanks for sharing at the weekend blog hop.
    clairejustine recently posted…Chocolate Guinness Cake..My Profile