The smirk on my face in this picture says it all… “You know what you can do with your what not to wear after whatever age list, right?!”
Yes, this topic has been beaten to death. And yes, some of the beatings have come from me. After all, the tagline of my blog is “personal style is a matter of taste…not age”. But once in awhile when I’m bored I’ll google search things that amuse me. One of those things is what not to wear if you’re 40, if you’re 50, if you are a three-headed fuchsia alien from a galaxy far far away…you get the idea. The thing is though, even though the topic has been covered ad nauseum, I really don’t think it can be covered enough. The message needs to reach the masses my friends.
We can wear whatever we damn well please regardless of age, gender or any other descriptor you can think of.
With that being said, the list I happened upon last night was disturbingly enough, written by a woman in her 50’s. Oftentimes said articles are written by clueless 20-somethings who don’t realize that one day they too will be over whatever age it is they’ve deemed the cutoff for fashion. But no, this article was written by a woman who should know better, and it was written for the AARP no less. The freakin’ AARP…isn’t the whole point of that organization to advocate for people 50 and over? What the hell? Since when did that mean advocating for “dressing your age”; whatever that’s supposed to mean.
Apparently, this woman’s style epiphany came upon her the night her son and his girlfriend gave the dress she was wearing the hairy eyeball and after the girlfriend said, “It’s a cute dress” the son followed up with, “Ya, it’s cute but it would be cuter on her”, referring to his girlfriend. At which point she high-tailed it back upstairs and changed her dress. Ummm….what? Adult or not, if my son said that to me, I’d cuff him upside the head and tell him to bite me.
I decided to take it upon myself and highlight some of my outfits that included pieces that were on her no-no list. The photo above covers the “deliberately ripped clothing” item on her list. Although, if I were a bettin’ girl, I’d say she’s not sporting a moto jacket or sequin top either.
If you’d really like a good read in regard to what really not to wear after 50, take a gander at this article. I think it’s one you’ll actually enjoy.
We can wear whatever we damn well please regardless of age, gender or any other descriptor you can think of. ‘Nuff said.
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And now without further ado…my interpretation of all things one should not wear over 50…
1. MINI SKIRTS AND GRAPHIC TEES… BONUS POINTS BECAUSE I’M WEARING BOTH IN ONE OUTFIT.
2. STRAPPY SANDALS… UMMM…WHAT?
3. SKINNY JEANS…AND THEY’RE DISTRESSED…WHAT A HOT MESS.
4. GRAPHIC TEE, SHREDDED JEANS, AND OH, THE HORROR…THERE’S A FLASH OF TUMMY.
5. FISHNET TIGHTS… YEP, I’M DEFINITELY WALKING ON THE EDGE OF LOOKING LIKE A HOOKER.
6. THIGH HIGH BOOTS…DAMN GOOD THING I DIDN’T PAIR ‘EM WITH THE FISHNETS…
7. SHEER TOP…TOO BAD THE LIGHTING ISN’T QUITE RIGHT SO YOU COULD GET A CLEAR SHOT OF THE BLACK BRALETTE UNDERNEATH IT…WOULD’VE BEEN PERFECT WITH THE FISHNETS AND OTK BOOTS.
8. JOGGERS/PAJAMA PANTS…WHILE YOU ALL KNOW MY FEELINGS ABOUT ACTUAL PAJAMAS IN PUBLIC, MY JOGGERS ARE TECHNICALLY PAJAMA-LIKE…I KNOW I WEAR JOGGERS TO BED FROM TIME TO TIME SO THESE COUNT AS PJ’S.
9. VISIBLE BRA STRAPS…IS THAT SOMEHOW DIFFERENT FROM LAYERING TWO CAMIS? STILL TWO SETS OF STRAPS, RIGHT?
10. CHAINS…HUH??? WHAT’S UP WITH NO CHAINS??
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