It’s no secret that I love dogs. Any size, any breed, any age…I love ’em all. Currently we have four; all different personalities and all different breeds. I’m an equal opportunity dog lover. Even so, I do have a few breeds that I am partial to…
…Shelties because, well, how can you not love a Collie that you can carry around and hold on your lap? Something about the mini-me version of a big dog gets me every time. Hence the reason we own a miniature pinscher. If I had to pick a favorite though, it would be an English Bulldog. I love all bully breeds, especially pit bulls and Frenchies, but my husband’s years long obsession with English bullies rubbed off on me.
The point of my rambling is this: a lot of people profess to love bulldogs. They ooh and aah over the chubby wrinkles and pin insanely cute bulldog photos to their Pinterest boards. Buuut…to really love English Bulldogs, to actually adopt one as your very own fur child, you have got to be committed. Like seriously committed. Because man, they are disgusting creatures! Believe me, I say this with all of the love in my heart, but seriously, bulldogs are absolute mannerless heathens. And if my experience is any indicator, they are all that way. We are on our second English and also had a sweet American bully named Maggie. Sweet, yes…mannerless heathen? Also yes.
Two recent bulldog related events actually prompted this post. The other night I flopped down on the couch and tossed my throw blanket on and…smack, I get hit in the face with a wet slimy section of blanket. For those of you who are uninitiated, bulldog spit isn’t like regular dog spit. It’s this gelatinous goo that turns his water into a bowl full of clear jello. He actually has his own bowl because the other dogs won’t drink out of his dish.
Now this is not the first time I’ve been smacked with a dripping blanket. As a matter of fact, the throw blankets get washed numerous times a week because bullies have this thing about blanket sucking. Not chewing, sucking. Like a pacifier. And if you’ve never seen a bulldog’s open mouth then you have no idea how truly large they are. I could stick my head in Bawb’s jaws and charge admission like they do at those alligator attractions in Florida. Maybe I should keep that in mind for a side job when I’m on summer vacation.
Anyhow, large jaws mean the ability to suck half of your throw blanket down their throat. And although my husband and I both know this, more times a week than I can count one of us flops down on the couch grabs a blanket and then you hear, “God damn it, Bawb!” I kid you not, the boy thinks his real name is God Damn It Bawb. Had we known, we would have written that on his registration papers.
Now for the second thoroughly gross behavior. He eats everything. Literally everything. If it’s in his reach, it’s his to eat. Bawb’s world, Bawb’s rules. Remember the spider captive I mentioned in Monday’s post? Ya, well, yesterday morning I was on the computer before work and I notice Bawb near the candle jar…the now knocked over candle jar. I’m sure by now you know where this is going…before I could stop him in his mouth went the spider.
Countless times I have held his mouth open and fished around in there with my bare hand to remove various and assorted items…a screw, a nail, underwear, socks. Sometimes I don’t even know what’s in there when I reach in. I just feel around until I find it. Fun times the day I pulled out a wasp, you know, because I love insects so much. I’m a dedicated bulldog mom, but a girl has her limits. I was not, in no uncertain terms, reaching in there to pull out a wolf spider. Hells no. Not happening. So my boy had an after breakfast treat. See what I mean? Gross. And don’t even get me started on bulldog farts…
The first time I wore this floral peplum top, I wore it with denim shorts and layered it over my Old Navy black peplum cami. This time I paired it with jeans and layered it over my light blue peplum cami also from ON. The floral peplum top is cute on it’s own with the little ruffle, but the addition of the just perfect length peplum cami underneath adds a little something to it; how fortuitous that the length and cut of the Old Navy camis pair with the floral peplum top like they were made for each other. And how about the polka dot clutch to throw in a little print mix action? See, I told you…it’s a good idea to have a nice little clutch collection for a fast easy way to spice up a look.
Be on the lookout for easy layering pieces. I cannot tell you how much wear I’ve gotten out of these ON camis. They are the perfect length and weight to layer seamlessly under so many things. I have no doubt they’ll continue to get a lot of play clear through Fall and into Winter.
THE LINK UPS
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